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In 2002 the Thames Valley Early Music Forum held a limerick competition but it was a runaway victory for Geoff and Jackie Huntingford

If I say I·m soprano, you'll see,
They·ll make me sing up to a G.
But if I put 'alto'
They·ll make me sing so low
The tenors sound higher than me!

Why is it the tutors all lie
When they tell us the meaning of 'die'?
If it·s all about sex
Then we·d be nervous wrecks
Though we·d end every course on a high!

There once was a buxom young lassie
Who attempted to trill like Ganassi.
Her ornamentation
O'erstrained her foundation
Revealing a rather fine chassis.

I cannot get on with these bricks-
I really need barlines to fix.
When I see a square rest
What to do for the best?
To read it as two, four or six?

There was a sweet lady from Kent
Who said sorry wherever she went.
She never perceived
What her friends all believed,
That her playing was quite heaven-sent!

There was a conductor from Beccles
Who introduced Israel to Eccles.
He said 'You know me!
I shall take it in three!'
And thus earned himself three thousand

The winning three need to be taken together, as
you will see!

A German composer named Scheidt
Found himself in a corner queidt teidt.
Refusing some wein
From his old friend Joe Schein,
He ended up picking a feidt.

A German composer named Schein
Once offered Sam Scheidt a fein wein.
On refusal by Scheidt,
Schein cried 'Out of my seidt!
How dare you my fein wein declein!'

An old judge in majesty deidt
Had to sit on the case Schein v Scheidt.
He sent down Joe Schein
With a rather large fein,
And gave Samuel Scheidt a suspended

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